Metacognition
Published on April 18, 2004 By psychx In Misc
Maybe I am crazy but I am not one to usually get depressed and/or sad. I am not impartial to other emotions considering sometimes I am outraged, content, ecstatic, etc etc, but I rarely am down and or in a state of sorrow. There is one thing that gets me down that I am encouraged to share. As I woke up this morning at the inhumane time of 6:00 am to come into work, I got up and got ready and followed my usual Sunday morning routine operating like machinery and made it to work right when the sun was rising. I usually don't start thinking until after I have had coffee but I digress. I took a quick cigarette break or as the British say, I beat the fag, and I noticed what an amazingly beautiful day it is. This is where the melancholy wave of realization took me. I was inside an office sacrificing an incredibly beautiful day. Why was I at work when the sky seemed to never have been a deeper hue of blue. The air is crisp giving a human friendly temperature of 75 degrees fahrenheit a deceptively cooler feel. The clouds themselves are taunting me with their freedom. Yet I force myself to go back inside to only stare at this gorgeous day through 1.5 inch thick glass. Why do we do this to ourselves? I consider myself fortunate to be in the country and financial state that I am in and I know others may have it harder than me but I still wonder why we - in the U.S. especially - work ourselves to the bone. I am even envious of the birds! To attain greater possessions and position in life is why we work but are we missing out on a greater asset? The U.S. has the highest stress levels in the world and sometimes I feel like I will never see the end of working. So they tell me take a vacation Charlie! I say one week a year to enjoy this little blue planet we are on isn't enough. Maybe I am tainted from having been to a country not so long ago that enjoyed an hour break after lunch time from work. I am not lazy by no means otherwise I would not be up at 6:00 am but I just wish I could be outside today on a boat, on the beach, or at a theme park. (I live in Orlando or in other words right by Disney) Maybe I am just crazy...Just a thought
Comments
on Apr 18, 2004
I know just how you feel. It's pure agony for me to sit in a classroom and waste beautiful Texas days on mindless teachings from bored teachers. If it weren't for my friends, I don't know if I'd make it through school.

Maybe you should consider a new job. We only have one life to live, so I leave you with these two quotes.

"So the problem is, not taking any risks is the biggest risk of all." ~Can't Remember Who Said That

"This is your life, are you who you want to be?" ~Switchfoot (A Christian Band)

Trinitie
on Apr 18, 2004
Thanks for relating Trinitie, it's more of a quiet frustration that I feel. I know that if I lose focus I might not be where I want to be 40 years from now. I guess the real question is when I am 65 will I look back and say it was worth it? I guess I just want to reap what I sow...Hopefully it will be a full crop...
on Apr 18, 2004
In Britain men like myself work our peasants to the bone, people in Britain are terribly stressed. Let my fellow tycoons and I enjoy the foreign trips and lazy days, peasants were created by God to die in wars and serve men like myself.
on Apr 18, 2004
Right Sir Peter... gotta love capitalism huh?. Although I rather be a self-made man than a peasant from Britain. That deserves (as the British say) a cock to the beaver which I know a British man like yourself knows what I mean...
on Apr 21, 2004
psychx, you are so not crazy. i lived "your" life for so many years (complete with the standard dream of peace, space, and freedom). your article could almost have been written by the woman i was 2 years ago ... before i decided that nothing could be worth continuing to live in a city (as a marketing manager ... oh, the shame) for.

i can't speak for everyone, but from my own experience, the upheaval and turmoil i put myself and my hubby through to get us "here" (to a tiny village on the nsw north coast with a shoebox for a house and neighbours that give us home-grown veggies) was unquestionably worth it. buying ourselves a "life" has been the most enriching and amazing experience. the sacrifices indeed seem paltry compared with the way i feel every day.

peace to you, psychx. keep your dreams in mind. mig. XX
on May 01, 2004
Thanks for the advice mignuna, I know that it might be the stage I am at now where I have all these ambitions that I want to accomplish. I have much left of life and the course is planned but mostly unknown. For now I will continue on the path I am on although the life you have certainly seems peaceful. Thanks for replying.
on May 02, 2004
Exactly why I left my former career. Life's too short to worry about 'long term goals' and to work yourself to death. Yeah, we have to work to pay the bills and have some food and a few 'treats'. Most of ours 'needs' are really 'wants'. We could really live without them. But these are the very things we work so hard for and pretty much miss out on living.

I know exactly how you feel. Been there.